As The Hermit Commands
OK, that's not entirely true. I was going to get around to updating this weekend, but this evening The Hermit said to me "OK, hon? You really need to update your blog. Your last post was over a week ago. Your fans need you."
Really, he said that. He knows how to make me laugh.
But I know my family worries about me when I go too long. And I haven't been hugely busy like I was when I was doing my clinical prac, so what's my excuse this time?
It's been the troubles with Miss Thing. I think my mind just refused to really deal with it until my prac was over, and when it was it all came crashing down. I didn't want to go on about it here as I didn't want you all to roll your eyes because I was bitching and whingeing about my daughter... again. It's not like she's out shooting up drugs or committing murder, right?
So I've spent the last week or so trying to come to grips with it all. I've discovered that I'm more like my late father than I wanted to admit. And since my father could be stubborn at best and cruel at worst (usually when he had been drinking exceptionally heavily) when his feelings were hurt, you can imagine this was not a realization I enjoyed making. Since I was having such a hard time in coming up with the right words to say to my firstborn - I knew what had to be said but I just couldn't make the words come out - I made The Hermit do it.
I'm still upset with myself for not being able to do it. I did finally make an effort, but it nearly killed me and it felt so forced... This bothers me more than you can possibly imagine. So I'm fairly emotionally drained. I'm so tense and cranky and just. Not. Happy.
But the cage door was opened this weekend. Miss Thing has officially moved out. The Hermit helped her move her most of her things today. And I'm done talking about it. M'kay?
I'm trying to get my equilibrium back now, and will be back here on the blog this week. Match Report Monday returns tomorrow, and you can look forward to Photo Friday, the Skinfest and all the things that make this blog something you like to visit and read.
Thanks for being patient with me during this most difficult time. I'll try and be happy again for you, for my family, and for me.
7 Witty Remarks:
Honey, don't be happy for our sakes; be happy for yourself.
Hang in there.
Yes, hang in there.
We're having 18-year old issues too. I naively thought the parenting turmoil would go away when they grew up. Wrong.
Don't feel too badly about not being able to get the words out. I seem to remember having an awful time when my first born decided to drop out of school, get married and move to Germany. I don't think I got as bad as her father, but I'm really not sure because it si all a blur and I don't really want to remember it.
Things will improve from here on, I promise. She is a smart cookie and will come around a lot sooner than you think. Keep your chin up, and a smile on for the rest of the tribe. And keep the posts coming, because we miss them.
So long as the door remains open for return, then all will sort itself. I wouldn't redecorate her room quite just yet!
Good luck to you all.
If it helps at all...
I moved out of home when I was 16. My mum and I had a stupid fight, and she was just sick of me. I quickly found a home, and then she said that it was anger, and she didnt actually want me to move out.
I did anyway.
It has made me realise how much mum did for me, and it has honestly brought me closer to her.
We faught all the time when I was at home, but now we actually make an effort when we visit each other.
I managed to finish high school, and then go on to get my certifications at polytech.
I know may seem hard, but if you support your daughter, she will realise this, and hopefully see that you are just trying to help her.
Most teens these days want to be independant (Im 19) but it is so much easier when you know you have the love and support of your parents behind you.
Be there for her, but don't push it. Let her ask for help or advice if she wants to.
You did a fine job getting her this far. Now she has to try her wings and leave the nest.
Now, too, you have 25% more of your time to devote to the remaining three. They need you too.
It's a rite of passage for many kids Miss Thing's age. She'll come full circle in due time.
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