Saturday Skinfest

Since I've had both Miss Thing & Sparky's games cancelled this weekend due to the miserable weather we've been having, I find myself in the unique position to bring you the Skinfest on Saturday! Just like the title says! Will wonders ever cease? When it comes to getting the Skinfest out on time week after week, probably. But let's not think about that now. Let's get to the skin:

Just how brilliant was Darren Lockyer last night in the match against the Eels? Not only is he the Shirtless God, but he can pull last second tries out of his magnificent ass. If he's fit for Queensland, you cockroaches are in trouble.

Billy Slater, it's a good thing you're a better footy player than a surfer. Although I like your clothes, or lack thereof, better when you're surfing.

I have been sitting on this picture of Cameron Smith for ages, because personally I find it, well, icky. There's manly body hair and then there's, well, this. But I try to please all types, so maybe you'll like it. Please tell me if it was worth the pain to my eyes.

Remember Sarah McLachlan and her sensitive songs? Well, she totally rocks the bikini as well. I hate her now.

More skin next week!

Forgot

Did you ever hear a Hollywood starlet babble on about how they just "forget" to eat? And you just want to pin them down and stuff a peanut butter sandwich down their throat? I mean, how can anyone forget to eat? Choose not to eat I would buy, but not forget.

Until Monday when I forgot to eat breakfast.

It was one of those mornings. I was up at 6:15, just as the Hermit was leaving. Sparky had to be to the bus for just after 7am, which requires a quick 15 minute (round trip) jaunt down the road. Fortunately Miss Thing had a dentist appointment that morning and was able to stay home with Her Majesty - who hates having to come for the very quick car ride - and Clive who were still asleep. After coming back home I had to get the youngest two feed and dressed and Her Majesty ready for preschool while Miss Thing got herself ready for the dentist and school. Oh, and myself dressed and presentable to the world. I did manage to have at least one cup of tea and I think even a cup of coffee as I rushed around, managing to get it all done as we left home at 8:45. Huzzah!

I dropped Miss Thing at the dentist, took Her Majesty to preschool where I spent 10 minutes coaxing her into letting go of my leg and then made a quick dash back home to get her hat. Fortunately I was able to drop her hat with the director at the front counter so Her Majesty didn't see me and I wouldn't have to spend more time convincing her that I would indeed be picking her up that afternoon (I mentioned she'd become quite clingy lately). Back to the dentist to wait for Miss Thing to be finished, where I spent the next 20 minutes chasing Clive around the waiting area as he dashed between the water cooler and the front door, laughing maniacally as I pulled him away from each. The toys only held his attention for a minute or two at most - making water come from the cooler or trying to escape out the door into the car park is much more fun! For him.

By the time Miss Thing was done, it was well after 10am. I decided to drive her in myself as the bus trip would not get her there until well after the morning break. I had nearly finished my Diet Coke by now and my stomach was rumbling, but I told myself it hadn't been that long since we'd left home and I'd grab something when we got back. On the drive home I started to get a little shaky and I began to get annoyed with myself. For God's sake, couldn't I go a couple of hours without eating??? Had I turned into a glutton? Resolutely I pushed on as Clive began to doze off in the back. The Golden Arches beckoned to me; I ignored them. Colonel Sanders invited me to drop by; I declined.

I pulled into my driveway just past 11:30 and quickly bundled a sleepy Clive off to his bed. By now I was shaking badly, my stomach was aching, I was experiencing some tunnel vision and I was feeling very anxious. What the fuck? Finally, as I leaned against the kitchen counter trying to get hold myself, my nursing training pushed its way to the front of my confused brain: You're suffering classic signs of hypoglycemia, you idiot. Eat something. Now!

What? Hypoglycemia? My blood sugar isn't that low! It can't be! I just ate...

Shit. No I hadn't. I hadn't eaten breakfast. In fact, my last meal was 6pm the night before. Nearly 18 hours before. Not only had I forgotten to eat, I'd forgotten that I forgot to eat. And it wasn't so much forgetting to eat as not taking two minutes to grab a piece of fruit as I rushed about. I kept putting it off and putting it off - yeah, I'll grab it in a minute just let me do this first - until I forgot about it.

We don't keep orange juice in the house, so I quickly downed some carbohydrates and sat at the kitchen table until my blood sugar came back to normal. At least it gave me a chance to read the Sunday paper!

I've finally discovered a way to be like one of those Hollywood toothpicks superstars - just have 4 kids! Sure you won't have the huge house with more bathrooms than bedrooms, or the glamorous wardrobe, or even the body to fit into said glamorous wardrobe, but you can say you just "forgot" to eat!

Photo Friday

Once again from Miss WTF, I bring you the king:

Match Report Monday - UPDATED

Round 5 U13s, Div 2
Date: 25 May 2008, 9:00 am kickoff
Where: South Pine Sports Complex, Brendale
Who: Albany Creek Crushers v Wests Panthers
Score: 22-20, Albany Creek. UPDATED - The official score is listed thus, so I've changed it from my original 24-20 and made changes below. We were THAT close, people!!!!

It was another nail biter of a game with each team scoring 4 tries. The difference was in the kicking... and our boys not being in the game for the first 20 minutes. I'm going to revert to the Good, Bad, Ugly method of last week - but in reverse - as I'm short on time and Her Majesty and Clive are refusing to play nicely with each other. Even with this method I suspect it'll take me ages to write it. I really have to stop being so nice to Miss Thing and Sparky on the weekends and boot them off the computer so I can write a proper report.

The Ugly: To be honest there wasn't really any ugly. No injuries and the only thing I can really classify as ugly was watching Albany Creek players turn on each other in the same way our boys can do when it's not going well. It's a team, remember?

The Bad: Well we lost again - 3 in a row - so again that gets the 'bad' classification. The first twenty minutes of the first half could be labelled bad as Wests just weren't in the game and allowed Albany Creek to take a whopping 16-0 lead that they just couldn't get back. Bad passing, poor tackling - or no tackling for that first try - it was all there. Or not there, depending on your point of view. Also bad - having 4 asthmatics on the team and not ONE of them has an inhaler! This necessitated a quick run to the nearest chemist by Tania before the start of the game.

The Good: Despite losing the match, after the first 20 minutes the boys came roaring back as if someone flicked a switch and dominated the rest of the game. Charlie came close with a great run but was brought down just 10 metres out before Jack the Taller scored our first try right under the goal posts and converted to bring the score to 16-6. With only a few minutes left in the half Sean scored the second try - I missed this as I was taking Her Majesty to the loo - but the conversion was missed and so at halftime the score was a more respectable 16-10. (UPDATE - I will presume it was in this first half that Albany Creek missed one of their conversions as I know for certain they made the final one. Score lines have been adjusted since the original post.)

Albany Creek drew first blood in the second half to bring the score to 22-10, but from then it was the Wests Panthers show. They tackled, they passed, they ran and they kept at it all half. DJ scored in the left corner and somehow Jack the Taller made the conversion to make it 22-16. Albany Creek, sensing the game was getting away from them, threw everything they had at the Wests line but desperation defence and chasing kept them out. Great never-say-die chases by Josh, Scott and DJ especially. Our boys kept their heads - except that one incident with Josh who continued to argue with the ref about the double movement of the Albany Creek player, which the ref had correctly called, until DJ loudly (so loudly I heard him on the other side of the field) yelled at Josh "He said that already Josh!" to snap him out of it - and gave Wests lots of opportunity to score. Jack the Taller got over for his second try just to the right of the posts but missed the kick to bring the score to 22-20.

And there it would stay. Wests pressured and pressured and pressured the Albany Creek line so many times we thought for sure it would break. Chris, Simon, Eli, Josh, Zack, Broden... all tried to get over the line but AC was desperate and determined not to let it slip away and in the end time just wasn't on our side. It was a lesson that you can't not be in the game for the full 60 minutes and expect to win.

There were other good points as well. It was nice to see Jarrod come and cheer the boys on, albeit with one arm. And the player I mentioned last week who was causing a lot of friction finally crossed the line once and for all at training and has been summarily dismissed from the team. He's somebody else's problem now. (UPDATE - no, he's still our problem in other ways. F*ck!) There was a lighthearted moment in the early minutes of the game when DJ was being tackled; he goes to school with the boy making the tackle and halfway through it they both started laughing at each other. It was nice to see they don't take the game so seriously that they can't share a laugh, even when adversaries.

All in all, as you can see the good far outweighed the bad and ugly this week. It's just a shame you can win the battle but not the war, or game in this case. But it's great to see them so competitive week after week and to see the improvement in their game and their belief in themselves. The win is so close - Redcliffe, you don't know what you're in for!

Saturday Skinfest

Yeah yeah, it's Tuesday... Insanely busy is the only excuse I can offer you. That and not so good on the time management. Like you haven't figured that out already. :-)

Without further ado, or excuses:

Darren, please grow your hair again like this. It really counters your manly chest hair. Oh, and keep tugging on the shorts, m'kay?

I demand that the NSW Tourist department put these players on permanent display near the Harbour Bridge and Opera House for my enjoyment.

I will never get tired of looking at Cooper Cronk, even if I can help but giggle at his name.

I have no idea who Laura Vandervoort is but she's got the bikini body thing going on, so that's enough for me!

More skin, on time or not, next week!

Photo Friday

Thanks to everyone for their comments on my last post about Clive's lack of proper speech. You've all given me hope that my suspicions are correct - he's got everyone to talk and interpret for him - and those pushing me to get him evaluated just need to give him, and me, a break. I will likely take him to the child health nurses next month - he needs his immunization anyway - and see what they say but I won't be pushing for speech therapy or anything like that. Thanks everyone!!!

Now for this week's photo, courtesy of Miss WTF:

I never realised the colours that a pelican had. I just of thought of them as big boring birds with a floppy mouth. Seriously, she needs to start a website to sell her fantastic pics. Just think of all the Tigers games she could go to!

Family Update

Haven't done a general round-up of the brood in a while, so I thought I should do one today. That and my mind's a blank. I thought about doing a post about State of Origin as game 1 is tonight, but I did a post on that last year which summed it up pretty well (if I do say so myself). If you're one of my new expat readers, or a new reader in general, go and have a read so you'll understand what all the fuss is about. Unfortunately I have to work tonight, but have been assured that I can wear my 'Shut Up Gus' shirt and that the game will be on over the intercom system via the very high tech method of getting a radio and placing an open microphone next to it. If the replay is on Foxtel directly after, I may watch the second half when I get home after midnight.

Anyway, on with the update:

The Hermit: One of the very few things I self-censor on the blog concerns the Hermit's job. I can say there are a lot of changes going on and a fair bit of uncertainty what with the company being sold. He just doesn't know what's going to happen, and that makes for stress. He's doing his best to cope, but hasn't been sleeping all that well. The plus side of that is he's up to take care of little kids on the weekends - I had my first sleep-in in months last weekend - and even drive Miss Thing and Sparky in the mornings. You take your silver linings where you can find them. He's also taken on the task of teaching Miss Thing to drive a manual/standard car. It must be going well because the one time I took her to drive all I heard was "(the Hermit) says this" and "(the Hermit) said to do it like that" and "(the Hermit) says you ride the clutch". Shut up.

Miss Thing: As I just mentioned, she's got her learner's license and is learning to drive. She spends a lot of time swearing, apologizing and drifting to the left. It will be some time before I turn her loose on the main roads. School is going... well, she's still there. The AP is trying to get her into the other maths class now rather than waiting til semester 2, but there is concern Miss Thing will not finish her computer certifications if that happens. Given she handed some classwork to the Hermit over 2 weeks ago for him to help her with and still hasn't sat back down with him to go over it despite several reminders from me to do so, their concerns are justified. She has an interview with the Australian Defence Forces today concerning acceptance into the Gap Year program, and I'm praying to every deity I can think of for her to be accepted. She knows the precariousness of her position; she turned to me yesterday and asked plaintively what will she do next year if she's not accepted by the ADF. I told her we'd cross that bridge if we came to it.

Sparky: As you read every week, Sparky is enjoying his football very much this year. He'll come into the lounge room on a Friday night where I'm watching the NRL matches and talk about how he can't wait for his game on Sunday. School is going reasonably well. His teachers have told me that he needs to be refocused in class a lot; he's not one of those kids you can leave to their own devices. There have been a few issues with not getting homework done but I think I've nipped that in the bud. There was an incident a couple of weeks ago when the school called me to tell me Sparky was up at Student Services complaining about his nose burning. Um, okay? Turns out he had been involved in a cooking flour fight during break (he denies this saying he was just nearby, I ask if I look like I was born yesterday) and was feeling the after-effects. Needless to say, I did not rush out to pick him up and the school more than understood, they just had an obligation to tell me he was there. All in all, a typical 13 year old boofheaded boy.


Her Majesty: She can be a very restless sleeper, and that must have been what was going on the other night. She doesn't quite sleepwalk in the traditional sense - Sparky was one (not so much now) as was I - but she doesn't always remember being up. She has been quite clingy lately - getting upset when I go to work, not wanting to go to preschool, wanting me to walk her 5 steps to see someone she's known her entire life. I keep reminding myself it's a phase and it, too, shall pass. She still loves swimming, coming home to practice her breaststroke kicks on the couch, and is obsessed with her upcoming birthday in July. Her best friend is Harry Potter. The young wizard makes many visits to our place, teaching Her Majesty all kinds of things. Beats Miss Thing's imaginary friend at that age, a young boy who went by the name of Jerkyhead.


Clive: Our biggest concern with Clive is his speech, or lack of it. At 17 months he only has a handful of words, and they aren't words so much as sounds that we understand to mean certain things. 'ot' is 'hot', and he often purses his lips and blows after he says it, 'gah' with one hand raised over his head is 'bird', 'ah' followed by a panting sound is 'dog', and there are multiple combinations of 'dah' which mean anything from 'drink' to 'biscuit' to 'shoes'. I've gotten the rare 'mama' but not consistently. He understands what you say, and if you ask him to get something of his like his dummy or blanket or drink he'll toddle off to find it and is an exceptional mimic with movement. I tell myself the reason for his lack of proper speech - he makes all kinds of sounds and babblings - is that he manages to get his point across without it what with 5 people to translate for him, but I'm starting to be concerned. Still, he's very cheeky and will tear across shopping centres, football fields, car parks without a care in the world, often turning to laugh at me when he sees I'm following him. He's also very mechanical, loving nothing more than to close things that are open and open things that are closed. He's demanding as anything, is a bit of a bully with Her Majesty and never, ever, sits still. But his sloppy kisses where he tries to bite my lips off make up for everything.

Yours Truly: I mentioned in passing a few posts ago that I've been re-accepted to university to finish my nursing studies and get my BSN. This will allow me to get licensure in Queensland and resume nursing, I hope by the beginning of next year. I need to speak to someone at the university to get advice on what classes I need and to make sure I get all my clinical work done, and hope to do that tomorrow when it's just me and Clive at home. I'm really looking forward to getting it done, despite the fact I think I'll need a time machine to fit everything into my day. I'm still working at the supermarket 3 nights a week - it's not a job I'd do forever but I work with a great group of people which makes the job less tedious. Besides, I get paid a decent wage and I was just given an option to buy shares - tell me the last time a bottom-of-the-ladder worker in the US got to do that! Dealing with 4 always-on-the-go kids and a stressed out hubby gets to me sometimes but for the majority of the time I'm doing alright, thanks very much!

So there you have it. We return to shorter and pointless posts tomorrow!

Boowa and Kwala

Her Majesty is a big Playhouse Disney channel fan. It's got The Wiggles, Little Einsteins, Numberjacks and a heap of other preschool shows. On Saturday afternoon's there's usually a Disney movie to be had, although if they show The Little Mermaid II again I may have to scream. Clive's attention is often captured by the two 'hosts' - a couple of monkey puppets named Aah and Ooh.

In between the main shows there are often short, 2-4 minute shows. Are We There Yet, 5 Minutes More and, my favourite, Pingu. There is one of these shorts that really bothers me, however:


This is Boowa & Kwala. It's very obvious Kwala is a koala, despite the fact that none of the koala's I've ever met wear a beret or are jaundiced to the degree she is. Must be all that rich French food (the show is made in France). It's Boowa that bothers me. What the hell is Boowa supposed to be? I think he's supposed to be a dog - one site I found did agree with that (the main site is no help, I'm not even going to bother to link it) but really - does he look like a dog? How does 'Boowa' translate into 'dog'? Mutant dog, perhaps, exposed to faulty French nuclear reactors. I asked Her Majesty what he was, thinking that when it comes to stuff like this kids were more clued in than the parents, but she doesn't know either.

What does he look like to you? This show annoys me more than Barney the Dinosaur, and that's saying something.

Match Report Monday

Round 4 U13s, Div 2
Date: 16 May 2008, 7:15 pm kickoff
Where: Purtell Park, Bardon
Who: Wests Panthers v Deception Bay Wanderers
Score: 26-12, Deception Bay. Fudge bunnies.

'Fudge bunnies' was a favourite curse phrase of my mother's when we were young so our delicate ears didn't have to hear those naughty phrases like 'fucker' and 'c**ksucker' that our father uttered instead. Nice try, Mom!

Anyway, this is going to be a very vague match report as I spent the vast majority of my time chasing Clive around Purtell Park and making sure he didn't run onto the field as he tried to do many, many times. In between I settled a grouchy and tired Her Majesty and grumbled about Miss Thing who came to allegedly watch the game but spent most of her time in the car. Oh, and tried to watch the game myself. So let's break it down this way:

The Good: The boys played a much better game this week than they did last week. They had a full bench which gave some of the bigger boys a rest and allowed some of the newer boys an easier transition into the game. They worked the ball very well and during the first half held Deception Bay out for at least 10 minutes during a furious onslaught. Their tackles were fantastic and they all showed a lot of courage in taking on the big boys - one of them too much, but that's later. I was very impressed by the team's decision to wear black armbands to support teammate Chris, who suffered a terrible personal loss during the week; I think it shows a growing maturity and that great Aussie trait of mateship, really coming together as a team.

Tries were scored by Jack the Taller and Chris, at least I think the second try was by Chris. Not 100% certain on that. Jack the Taller converted both tries. There was a great moment in the second half when Wests won the scrum against the feed (which is unusual) only to have the ref repack the scrum for some unknown offence... which they won again! It really was brilliant! Great runs by Eli up the middle showed other boys they could do the same.

After the game, Tania and I were approached by visiting parents and told that not only were we the best team they've played, but had the nicest supporters. That's the kind of rep we want!

The Bad: Well, they lost which inherently is classified as bad. There was a bit of Wests-on-Wests bickering in the dying minutes of the game, which isn't helpful. Fellow forwards need to stop letting Josh do so much work in tackles. DJ needs to work on taking the kick - and I can say that 'cause he's mine. I always hold my breath when he takes the catch as I never know if he's going to nail it or knock-on; it's 50-50. But there wasn't too much bad. Deception Bay worked hard for the win.

The Ugly: One of our boys, who shall remain nameless, still hasn't figured out that bagging his teammates, his coach and just about everyone around him will not endear him to anyone. He could be an asset as he has some talent, but instead his behaviour causes unneeded friction.

Remember when I mentioned courage and taking on the bigger boys and it didn't work out so well for one of the boys? Oh it was just a couple of paragraphs ago! Right - Jarrod is out for an unknown about of time with a broken collarbone. In the first half he was given a penalty not 5 metres from the tryline. In what could be called an act of supreme courage for one of the smallest members of our team, or what his father semi-jokingly termed as an act of 'no brains', Jarrod took the tap and instead of passing to DJ or Chris on either side took on the line himself. Except the line consisted of 3 massive boys who had plenty of time to line Jarrod up and flatten him into the ground. He got up and played the ball, which led to Jack's try, but we could see he just wasn't right. He didn't come back on for the rest of the game and after 3 broken bones in 4 years (now 4 bones in 4 years) when Jarrod complained later about continued soreness he was taken to Children's Hospital - still in his football gear so staff didn't start to give Russell funny looks about the shear number of visits for broken bones.

We're away this weekend at Albany Creek, who we beat in the trials so it should give the boys a shot of confidence heading in. Unfortunately for many parents, who were looking forward to having later starts this year with older boys, it's a 9am game which makes it an 8am turn-up time (yes, it takes an hour to get them ready... like herding cats, really). Let's stop our losing streak at 2 - I have faith in them.

Saturday Skinfest

Another consequence of my busy weekend is that I haven't watched much football outside of Sparky's game Friday night (Match Report to follow.. well, precede really if you come to the site directly). In another downer I'll miss the first State of Origin Wednesday night due to work. I hope they switch from shopping muzac with the likes of Delta Goodrem, the Spice Girls and Mike and the Mechanics and put on the radio so we can listen to it at least. Otherwise I'll be up very late watching the replay on Foxtel.

At least I have the Skinfest to see the bodies I've missed, and so do you:

Will Chambers, like other Melbourne teammates who featured in weeks past, is looking all slicked up and studly for some event or another. I should care, but I keep getting distracted by his bellybutton. Really... it's too cute!

I'd really like to be holding Paul Whatuira's icebag. I said icebag you pervs... or maybe I just thought that other word in my head.

In a Skinfest first, we're combining a slice of beefcake and a piece of cheesecake all on one plate. Let me know if you like the combo:

The ever tasty and remarkably body-hairless Liam Fulton ('professional athlete'... just say footy player, m'okay?) and his too-skinny and obviously skanky oh-my-god-I-hate-her gorgeous and lovely girlfriend who's name I can't be bothered to look up I don't give two shits about will remain a mystery.

Now shoo green-eyed envy monster!

More skin next week!

Photo Friday

Ok, here I am ready to get caught up. It's ridiculous that two posts that take very little time are the ones I fall behind on. Thanks everyone - especially those who de-lurked - for understanding that my real life takes precedence over my blog.

Speaking of members of that real life (ok, I didn't mention them but pretend I did) here are two of them, Sparky and Her Majesty, at Sparky's birthday dinner back in February:

It Never Ends

Weekends like this never seem to end. I sat finally sat down at the computer half an hour ago to get caught up on Photo Friday and the Skinfest, only to have Her Majesty wake up and come out crying about "feeling funny in (her) bed". I have no idea what that means, only that she's been very clingy lately and has had a few late nights. I put her back to bed and stayed with her until she fell back to sleep. I'm not at all convinced she'll stay asleep, however, and there's still a load of laundry to toss in an put on time delay so it'll be done by morning. So I'm afraid the catch-up will have to wait until tomorrow so I can grab a couple of hours before she wakes up again.

Sorry folks.

Dinosaur

I really am a dinosaur when it comes to new technology. I'm very slow to embrace a lot of it, and it still boggles my mind that my USB memory stick has more memory than my first computer. I have a hard time wrapping my head around it. Sometimes a delay in embracing new things are good - witness the recent next generation of DVD "wars". Anyone remember betamax video tapes? And the Hermit still has a mini disc player in the closet that was purchased during the slugfest between these and mp3 players (like the iPod). Waiting can save you some money, but wait too long like I tend to do and it just labels you "old" and "out of touch".

I didn't get a mobile phone until after we arrived in Australia. Same with a DVD player and digital camera. I don't own a digital video camera (or any video camera for that matter, save what my digital camera does) and my DVD player doesn't record. I still don't have a webcam and I only just recently bought an iPod. The only reason I have a digital PDA in the form of my Palm is the Hermit; well before we came to Australia he caught a look at my calendar/address book/wallet and nearly fell over at the size of it. The only reason I upgraded it a few years ago is because I broke my monochrome one. But now Palms are considered out of date. Miss Thing had to teach me about Powerpoint presentations when she was in primary school. I know how to text message, but had to be taught that and still prefer to use full words instead of texting shortcuts like 'gr8' and 'c u l8r'. Blogging didn't happen for me til '05, but I'm still not on Facebook nor have plans to be. It is a very slow bridge over the digital divide for me.

So what newest thing, that's really not so new, has caught my eye? Podcasts. Sure I'd heard of them but assumed they were mainly hip and edgy and so not for me. Or all about new technology and still not for me. Silly silly Mooselet. I started out with a couple of local re-broadcasts from the talkback radio station I listen to. Then I got all excited when I found the history podcasts on iTunes a scant 10 minutes later. Discussions of history? You mean I'm not the only history geek out there? Then it was mythology. Today is astronomy and paranormal stuff. Then I found nursing podcasts (an important side note - I will be resuming my nursing education later this year as I've been re-accepted to university) . Of course the best part is that they're FREE! I like free stuff. No doubt I will weed out a few after listening to a couple of shows but I also have no doubt I'll be adding more down the road.

Now I can bore my kids to tears by listening to this stuff in the car instead of forcing them to listen to my diverse collection of 80s, alternative and metal music - that's separate genres, by the way, not all one bizarre form.

If you have an iPod or something similar, do you subscribe to podcasts? Do you have a favourite, or something you'd recommend? Be my guide in my "new" discovery by using the comments section below.

Match Report Monday

Round 3 U13s, Div 2
Date: 11 May 2008, 8:45 am kickoff
Where: Bora Ring, Nudgee
Who: Valleys Diehards v Wests Panthers
Score: 44-10, Valleys. Drat.

On Mother's Day (yes, we do celebrate Mother's Day on the same day as the good folks in the US) I had to get up at the god-awful time of 6:15 AM in order to shower and make sure the rest of my brood (minus Miss Thing and the Hermit) was up so we could head to the game. The reason it was so early was it was representative selection for all U13 teams and all the northside teams in all the divisions (there are 4) had to be fit in over the course of the weekend. Thank goodness it won't be a regular occurrence. It also helped that after arrival I discovered they had a coffee van with real coffee. I'm not a big coffee drinker, but at that hour I'll take all the help - in the form of a latte - that I can get.

Perhaps we should have gotten some for the boys as well, because it wasn't to be their best game. In fact, it was probably their worst performance since the trial games at the beginning of the season. Three boys were missing, and the one reserve we did have didn't have his mouth guard which meant he couldn't play. Bet he won't do that ever again! Maybe it was the time, maybe it was nerves after discovering they were being judged by representative selectors or maybe it just wasn't their day. Most likely a combination of factors lead to their not-so-great showing.

From the opening kick, the boys had a heap of calls against them. Offside from the kickoff, knock on, high tackle... it really took the wind out of their sails and before they knew it Wests was down 12-0 (thank goodness Valleys were scoring out wide and so their kicks didn't have much hope). The boys showed some spark, with good efforts by Jack the Taller and Chris and some spectacular tackles by Josh, but the teamwork was MIA. Valleys were desperate for their first win and with some great efforts by their bigger boys - and I will give credit where it is due they have matured since we last played them in U11s (except for that grubby little #6 who put DJ in hospital - he's still a ratbag) - they scored under the post to take the lead out to 18-0. It was in the dying stages of the half that Jack the Taller got over the line and converted his own try (least I think it was him... could've been Jackson) to make it a more respectable 18-6. It wasn't over yet!

There were moments of brilliance - or at least excellent effort - in the second half. As a matter of fact there was a good solid 10 minutes early on when they played just like they have been all season and gave the parents some hope. Good ball movement, running the ball up, teamwork in tackles... it was all there. DJ and Zack began to gel a bit a the centre/winger combo and there were fewer penalties going against them. Unfortunately they just couldn't break Valleys line and they quickly faded. Valleys were able to stretch their lead to 28-6 before DJ was able to get over the line down the right side to bring the score to 28-10 after the unsuccessful conversion attempt. Again there were some individual efforts - Jack the Taller continued to play well, DJ woke up a bit and had some good breaks as did John on the opposite side and new winger Zack, Simon kept those big legs pumping, and Chris and Josh continued their defensive efforts but individuals don't win games, teams do. Two more Valleys tries quickly blew the scoreline out to 40-10. Wests were denied a certain try after a pass to DJ was called forward and later Jack the Taller's reaching effort was deemed just short of the line. Valleys was able to score one final time as the fulltime horn sounded, but missed the conversion, to end our less than stellar performance.

Every team has their off days - after all it was the mighty North Queensland Cowboys who gave the hapless South Sydney Rabbitohs their first win of the NRL season just 2 weeks ago - and this was ours. The boys are sitting in 4th position on their ladder, a place they've never been before. They can bounce back - I have faith in them. Bring it on, Deception Bay - we're ready for you!

17

As Momma Mooselet noted in the Skinfest comments, it was Miss Thing's birthday yesterday. She turned 17. I find it hard to believe I'm the mother of a 17 year old - I can still remember when she looked like this:

The conehead is a result of 22 hours of unsuccessful labor - a fact I never let her forget.

Now she's learning to drive, attempting to pass high school and has more ex-boyfriends than I have digits. She is beautiful and far more outgoing than I ever was. The term "high-maintenance" was made for her. Her Majesty adores her. She possess a single-mindedness and determination to do things her way that will serve her well one day. She pushes my buttons like no one else and sends me to the brink of insanity on a regular basis.

Yet I wouldn't change a moment of the past 17 years nor give her up for all the chocolate in the world. Wait... just kidding, I wouldn't. Really.

Happy birthday sweets!

Saturday Skinfest

Thanks to everyone who expressed their concern about my sunshine yellow nasal discharge - it's much improved although the sun still shines out of my, er, nose now and again.

And a special 'huzzah' to all the mothers who are reading this. I hope you had/have an awesome Mother's Day no matter where you are in the world! Here's my bit to make it a little extra special for you:

Greg Inglis looking all fierce and studly... I like that!

Luke O'Donnell looking all fierce and ripped... I like that too! Although his pointy man nips are a little scary.

Matt Hilder looks neither fierce nor ripped, but still studly. I'd take him.

My final Liz picture. Air brushed? Check. Me not giving a shit? Check. She's still hot.

More skin next week!

Photo Friday

Thanks to Miss WTF who snapped this photo of Her Majesty on Sunday at Sparky's footy game. The playground was very close to where we were cheering the boys on, so Her Majesty could go and play while I was nearby:

Singing in the Nude

Your national rugby union team has just suffered a humiliating defeat. On your side of the scoreboard there is a big fat goose egg while the other side is far and away into double digits. How do you cope with your loss?

If you're a member of the Austrian national rugby team, you and your mates do a public - and one hopes drunken - strip tease/haka to "Singing in the Rain".

Don't believe me? Click here to watch. (I should mention the video is towards the bottom... hee!) And in case you missed the whole "nude" and "strip tease" part, you probably shouldn't watch it at the office, or in the presence of small and easily impressionable children (unlike the small child who appears around the 2:15 mark in the video). Or if the sight of male dangly bits offend you... in which case you probably wouldn't read my blog.

I have no idea what the text says, as the website is in Lithuanian, or some similar language. Here's what I can tell you from the Yahoo story: the Austrian team lost to Lithuania 48-0 and after a night on the piss (conjecture on my part, but would you do this sober?) in Vilnius decided on a much better performance.

I would like to request that should the New Zealand rugby league team lose by such a margin to Australia on Friday night that they immediately perform this routine. Or if a miracle should occur and Australia lose by such an amount then the Kangaroos should do it. Or, you know, if either team loses by any margin. Really, is it so much to ask?

Yellow

I'm starting to wonder if there's something else going on with this ongoing head cold I have. I've stopped the Cold & Flu medication because it was seriously fucking with my balance. It was bad enough what with the sinus pressure on my eardrums, I didn't need it to be worse. I'm only using the SprayTish at night to try and minimize the rebound congestion that can sometimes happen with prolonged use.

But I started to worry today when I blew my nose. I'm not one to examine the huge amounts of mucus that come out of me, but when I pulled the tissue away the colour caught my eye. It was bright yellow. Fluro yellow. Lemon rind yellow. The type of yellow your urine gets when you take a lot of B vitamins.

I have enough knowledge to know that white and/or clear is just annoying, and green and/or yellowish-green indicates a sinus infection. But fluro yellow snot? What the hell is that? It's not even all the time - just every few blows (there's a joke there, but I'll leave it alone) I get a gob full of glowing mucus. I don't have a fever, and there's moderate but not overwhelming sinus pressure. I'm not coughing up anything. I'm still a little off balance, especially when I change positions, but it's better than what it was.

So if someone can clue me in as to why the contents of my congested nose are the colour of a glow stick, I'd appreciate it. I'm starting to wonder if I'm an X File.

Match Report Monday

Late again, I know. Shoot me. No, really. I'm still sick, and spent the better part of yesterday trying to feel better. My vertigo is nearly gone, as is my headache. So let me gather my notes - yes, I took notes - and get underway. There they are, under a pile of tissues. Also this week - pictures!!! Thanks to Miss WTF who took time out of her day to turn up and snap some awesome photos. I know they're mostly of Spartucus (his grown up blog name), but she could've sent me others and I would use them.


Round 2 U13s, Div 2
Date: 4 May 2008, 2:00 pm kickoff
Where: Allan Cash Park, Samford
Who: Samford Stags v Wests Panthers
Score: 28-18, Wests. Revenge is ours Mwahahahhahahaha!!!!!!!

So I looked up when the last time we won two games in a row, if ever, since I couldn't remember. It was way way WAY back in August 2006... 21 months ago. Holy crap. That's a long time between drinks.

The boys were fired up for this match. After all, it was only a couple of weeks ago we had certain victory snatched from our hot little hands by a slow timepiece. So with revenge on the brain and a lot of parents with their own stopwatches, and a nearly full compliment of 16 players, the mighty Panthers came back to Samford to get the win when it counted.

Somehow, those big boppers of Samford had multiplied because it seemed there were a fair few more of them this time than last. They, too, were fired up and I thought for sure they were going to draw first blood but some great chasing brought them down before the try line. I also thought they were going to draw first blood literally as they kept aiming for the head in their tackles. There was a lot of back-and-forth hard hitting action as each team tried to find the weakness in the others line. We found it first, with Josh slotting through around the 10 minute mark. New kicker Sean and his, er, interesting steps (picture a bit of Riverdance) converts to take the 6-0 lead. Wests got a little giddy, I think, and had a few penalties as well for high tackles. I'm not sure how they could've tackled high as a lot of those boys were a head higher than our tallest players, but the ref blew his whistle a lot for it. Samford managed to get over the line of the back of just such a call to level the scores 6 all.

I don't know why DJ looks so scared coming up to the number 18 - he was the smallest one out there!

It didn't last, however, as Josh again barged over the line in the right corner. Those corner tries are difficult to convert, despite Sean's best efforts, so the score remained 10-6. Samford got a little cranky and poor Jack the smaller (we have 2 Jacks and a Jackson for heaven's sake, I must find some way to differentiate) took a palm square in face, sending him to the turf in agony. A few Wests parents got a bit rowdy, I admit - remember Mum's & Dad's we have to behave ourselves else we get the boys in trouble, not to mention ourselves potentially banned and a reputation that belongs at other clubs - but geez it's hard to control yourself when it happens right in front of you and the ref nearly gets it wrong!

Our boys took exception to such treatment and decided the best form of payback is to score another try! Jack the taller, who showed great promise in his first game as halfback, fought his way over the line to bring the lead out to 14-6. Not long after, in fact I think it was on the next set, Chris grasshoppered over. Poor Sean was getting very frustrated with himself and his inability to get just the right spin on the ball - never mind mate, it'll happen - and the score sat on 18-6. Wests must've gotten cocky again as there were a few silly penalties and they started to revert to their old habits of bunching up, not spreading the ball and running sideways. They paid for it as Samford was able to score a try in the dying minutes of the half off a Wests knock-on to bring the score to 18-12.

Talk to the hand...

Panthers were a bit slow to start the second half, allowing the Stags to gain some easy metres. Samford's try was a bit controversial as the touch judge had called them offside, but the ref had already awarded it and so couldn't take it back. 18 all. Boys of old would've pissed and moaned - boys of now finally fired up. Great tackles by all kept Samford pinned down in their half and allowed for some good field position and a repeat set when Samford was tackled in goal. Coach Tom must've reminded them that passing works, too, as they worked the ball along the line until Scott spotted the opening and darted across to take the lead back 22-18.

The ref spent the next few minutes calling high tackles on both sides, with Jarrod nearly being decapitated (OK, maybe a bit of an exaggeration but really it was pretty brutal). Finally the captains are called over and spoken to. Samford has the ball and DJ attempts a tackle on a player; he jumped up and grabbed the shoulders from behind as the player was at least a head taller... and is promptly sin binned by the ref. What the hell? Ref called it high and sin binned him as they were just spoken to. DJ goes to serve his ten minutes amid much grumbling from Wests parents. Fair enough, we suppose (although not really), so long as you sin bin the next Samford player who commits the same offence. Not two minutes later the whistle goes again... high tackle Samford... no sin bin. Shouts from the Wests parents end of the park at the unfairness of the call. DJ told me after the game there were shouts from the Samford end for us to "settle down" and "get over it".

Tackles like this will not get you in trouble...

The boys had the right idea, however. They'd score instead. Despite being a player down for 10 minutes Samford really never looked dangerous - except in the swinging arm department - but Wests sure did. Josh decided to match DJ's hat trick last week and scored under the posts to allow Sean the easy conversion (his mother still couldn't look) and to bring the lead to 28-18. DJ came back on with 5 minutes to play and managed not to tackle above the waist. The whistle blew - again - and we let out a collective "Now what?". Full time. It was over. Really? We looked at our watches - yup, 30 minutes. It was really over? We'd won it? No joke, it took a good 30 seconds for it to sink in and for the cheer to go up from the supporters end.

See, there's the score! Happy Panthers lead off by Coach Tom leave the field.

The boys had their revenge. It wasn't always pretty, but an ugly win beats a pretty loss. We know, we have a lot of experience in losses, both pretty and butt ugly. No worry about the heat next week - game time is at 8:45 am! Ugh. So much for my Mother's Day sleep-in (which I never get anyway, but now I can't even complain)! Still, we can make it an unprecedented 3 in a row and give Mum's a really nice gift - a win. Or at least another fantastic, if heart stopping, effort.

Saturday Skinfest

Finally, a chance to sit down at the computer! Woot woot! Thank goodness tomorrow is yet another holiday leading to another 3 day weekend - and I don't have to work! Yet I still get paid. I love this country.

Let's just get stuck into it before I fall asleep:

I watched Darren Lockyer on a widescreen TV Saturday night and let me tell you it makes his legs look bigger than they already are. I can only imagine what it would do to his chest hair.

I don't even know for certain if all of these guys are NRL guys. If they were I couldn't even tell you their names. Does that make me a bad person?

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn't belong. Somehow I don't think you'll see this on Sesame Street anytime soon.

Finally, another Liz. Can't stay away from the Liz.

More skin next week!

Photo Friday

I'm feeling much better this morning. Still congested and still sound a little scratchy, but that's what two hours of parent/teacher conferences will do to you. I'm also glad I have a free day today - free from appointments and kid activities, free from work. Still have a boatload of laundry and a house that looks like a tornado swept through it, but I can stay at home.

Clive is feeling better as well. He didn't sleep at home that afternoon;after screaming through a few 10 minute conferences (thank goodness the hall was already noisy, nobody seemed to notice him) he feel asleep for another half an hour, which enough for me to finish. But here is Clive in one of his favourite activities, eating: