The Reason

Now that my other issue has been resolved, I feel like I can tell you about it. It was causing me a lot of anxiety and making me so down that I didn't even feel like blogging. Since I enjoy blogging so very much and have precious little time to do it these days - never mind reading the fantastic blogs that are in my feed reader - you know it had to be a major thing to put me off my blog.

Nearly all of you know that I'm a Registered Nurse, at least I am in the US. It took me until my mid-20s to work out that being a nurse was not a betrayal of the feminist ideals I had been brought up with and it was what I wanted to do with my life. I feel passionately about nursing - it's not just my job, but it's part of who I am. When I'm asked what I miss about the US, my answer is always "my family and my job". I put off pursuing my career here for a number of reasons, mainly Her Majesty and Clive, but recently started to go about getting it back on track. You may remember I talked about my trials with bureaucracy and apathy in dealing with various institutions, and had said I was just going to go back to university here and get it done.

All was back on track, and I was very excited to learn that all I had to do was clinical work - even if it was going to take me half a year longer than I hoped. Sure I was hoping to have it done sooner rather than later, but mid 2009 with a licence and a degree wasn't too shabby. Until early last week, when it looked as if it was all going to hell in a handbasket again. Suddenly I was being asked for the same documentation that the QNC was looking for and that I had been unable to get my hands on. Via email, I pleaded my case with the director of the university program and was told repeatedly that unless I could get those documents, I would not receive credits for my prior education and would have to start from scratch.

Last Monday was my lowest point. I was only the second time I have ever regretted coming to Australia because (I reasoned in my pitiable state) I gave up the career I worked so hard for, walked away from a job that I loved and where I had so many options. Now where was I? Literally halfway around the world away from my family and friends and with a career that I was being held back from. I just sat on the floor and cried - freaking poor Clive out in the process. He kept shoving me and letting out little shrieks of dismay, trying to get me to stop. I'm not one to wallow that deeply in the self-pity pool, so I pulled myself together enough to stop crying and over the next two days convinced the director to see me personally the following week to discuss my case.

I wasn't hopeful as I'd seen many folks come to Australia with various qualifications and degrees only to be told it wasn't good enough. Hell, I've seen folks come from other parts to Australia to Queensland and told they weren't good enough to work in their particular field. I gathered what little documentation I had, dragged Her Majesty and Clive along for a bit of sympathy and went to make my case.

My case was a good one, I thought. The university had accepted me back in 2002, so why reject me now? The description of the nursing program that I had from the year I graduated was not what I had taken but was very very close. It really came down to my degree, an Associates Degree in Nursing. There is no real equivalent in Australia and for a few minutes it looked as if that would be the sticking point, especially when after doing a Google search he read this statement:

The 2-year Associate Degree focuses more on technical skills than theory and is often a stepping stone to the BSN.

He turned and looked at me expectantly and I thought, "Fuck. I'm fucked." I agreed that yes, many holders of an Associates go on to obtain their Bachelors, but an Associates was not an obstacle to taking the National Licensure Exam, the NCLEX. In fact, I continued, I took the same exam as a graduate from the top 4 year nursing school in the US and held the same license. Different pathways lead to the same exam, the only limitations come from the job market. Several minutes ticked by as the director looked through my documents again and read his computer screen, with the only sounds coming from Clive as he happily pounded on the keyboard of a computer I was sitting in front of. I may have stopped breathing. Oh please, please, pleasepleasepleaseplease...

Finally the director held up one of the papers I had brought - the notice that I had passed my NCLEX exam back in 1999. I had only saved that paper because of what it meant to me at the time - I remember opening the letter at the mailbox and dancing at the foot of my driveway as traffic drove past because I had passed the exam and could begin my career as a RN. Once I had my license it was nothing more than a memento, but for some reason I brought it. It was that letter, with a 10 year old digital picture of me and with my maiden name, that sealed the deal and convinced the director to give me all the credit points I needed to resume studies this semester.

I could have hugged the man. I could have hugged him even more as he held the corner of the form for me to fill out as I held Clive with my other hand - how many men know enough to do that? One with 8 kids, apparently! I didn't hug him, but thanked him at least a half dozen times. When he told me to submit copies of my transcript, licence and NCLEX letter, I didn't point out I'd already submitted the first two - I just agreed.

Now that I'm back on track and ready to start my clinicals in a couple of weeks - 5 days a week for 4 weeks - I'm feeling much lighter and happier. Still worried as hell as to how I'm going to manage to do everything in those 4 weeks, and how I'm going to pay for full time childcare for Her Majesty and Clive for 4 weeks, but getting back into nursing has lifted a weight from my soul. Bring on the bodily fluids - I'm ready!